Little Britain character guide
"...But where do these characters
actually come from? "Our imaginations," insists Walliams. "I mean, it's a
strange one, because people often think that you will have met all of the people
represented in the show. Often, a certain person might inspire a little part of
it. But then they start to take on a life of their own.
"We just try to make each other laugh.
That's what we're directed by, really," Lucas elaborates. "David's very prolific
at that, I find. I do the typing and David does lots of talking, and walks
"So, it's always the two of us, and
what we find funny, and you know if one of us has an idea, really we both have
to kind of like it, or at least believe in it to some extent, to start writing
it. Which is fine - it's when we're both laughing when we're writing that we
know we're really onto something.
"It's horrible when you've got
characters who people love, because they sort of want to see those characters,
and the challenge is to try and keep things fresh, and not either sell out the
character or change the situation too much."
Anne is a patient at the Steven Spielberg Psychiatric Hospital in Little
Bentcock, under the care of the progressive Dr Lawrence.
Despite her random screeching and random acts of destruction, Dr
Lawrence forges ahead with his programme to assimilate Anne into the
"Eh, eh, eh!"
Bubbles De Vere
'Bubbles', real name 'Denise' De Vere was born in 1930 in Hull.
Bubbles seems to be on a permanent holiday at the Hill Grange Health Spa
She hasn't yet settled her bill and is constantly pursued by the spa
manager, Mr Hutton, to settle up. Mrs Bubbles Devere is not above using
her feminine wiles to divert attention away from her ever-increasing
"Call me Bubbles darling, everybody does"
"Very devious, don't you think"
Daffyd was born in the small Welsh mining village of Llandewi Breffi. He
left school early in protest in not being allowed on stage 'Bent' as the
end of year school play.
Proud to be gay, Daffyd flaunts his sexuality in a variety of rubber
outfits, to the villagers' complete indifference. He refuses to accept
he's not the only 'gayer' in the village, and is outraged when other
gays walk anywhere near his land.
"I'm the only gay in the village and that's that!"
Many legends of stage and screen have graced the door of showbiz agent
Jeremy Rent, and you'll often find him having a little bit of trouble
finding work for client Dennis Waterman.
Teeny weeny Dennis keeps turning down scripts to TV shows because he
always wants to "star in it, write the feem toon, sing the feem toon",
leaving Jeremy somewhat exasperated.
and Ting Tong Macadangdang
On the Mike McShane estate in Bruise, Dudley is excitedly looking
forward to the arrival of his new bride, Ting Tong Macadangdang, loving
chosen from his 'Thai Brides For You' brochure.
However, when she arrives, Ting Tong does not quite match the picture in
the brochure. In fact she could be prosecuted under the Trade
Descriptions Act. Incensed Dudley orders Ting Tong to leave, but with
some subtle persuasion she convinces him she can stay, just for one
Dame Sally is mistress of the romantic bodice-ripper novel.
In her huge country mansion, she reclines on her chaise longue and
dictates her latest masterpiece d'amour to her secretary, Miss Grace.
Miss Grace is a simply wonderful secretary - quite honestly, Dame Sally
couldn't get by without her. "How many pages?"
Rubbish transvestite, Emily Howard, might be no less ladylike than some
of the other genuinely female characters, but she certainly gets upset
if you don't treat her like a lady!
You may also notice Emily's other half - the one with the moustache,
Florence. These two real ladies are definitely not a couple of rubbish
transvestites. Merci beaucoup!
"I'm a lady!" "I do ladies things... stroke kittens... and s**t"
She's a sweet old lady, always ready to stop and have a chat, whether it
is at the supermarket, the post office or in the street. The only
problem is her inability to control certain bodily functions.
||Harvey and Jane
Harvey and Jane are a young couple in love, just like any other. Only
thing is, Harvey's a bit of a mummy's boy and just can't cut the apron
strings. As they plan their wedding and future lives together,
everything stops when Harvey wants bitty. And if mummy's got none left,
nana's will do.
An obnoxious, charmless man, stage hypnotist Kenny Craig has no worries
about using his skills to get his own way.
He's not half as good as he thinks he is though, and most of the time,
when his victims look into his eyes, not around the eyes, look into his
eyes, they're only doing it to keep him happy.An obnoxious, charmless
man, stage hypnotist Kenny Craig has no worries about using his skills
to get his own way. He's not half as good as he thinks he is though, and
most of the time, when his victims look into his eyes, not around the
eyes, look into his eyes, they're only doing it to keep him happy.
She just loves everything froggy: ornaments, tea towels, birthday cakes,
cuddly toys – in fact anything and everything frog-themed.
However, she has a rather violent reaction to the real thing…
Lou Bob Todd is a helper to his wheelchair-using friend, Andy Pipkin.
The caring Lou seems unable to grasp that Andy does not need his
wheelchair in any way. Just keep an eye out when Andy's helper turns
"Yeah I know"
"I want that one"
"Monster trucks, monster trucks, monster trucks yeah!"
"What a kerfuffle"
Maggie and Judy
Women like Maggie and Judy are the very backbone of the place we call
Britain. Stalwarts of local womens' organisations and the Conservative
Party, it's moral guardians like these who have made Britain what it is
But you offend their sense of what is proper at your peril. One hint of
a lesbian marmalade and Maggie will project all her disapproval on you.
Stand well back.
Marjorie, the leader of Fat Fighters is someone that doesn't mind
expressing herself when it comes to teaching her 'fatties' how to loose
a few pounds. Vanessa Felts for example, her fat fighters experience
doesn't quite go to plan when Marjorie is in the room...
"Everyone loves a bit of cake"
"Dust, anybody, no?"
Eccentric Scot Ray runs the Ye Olde Hotel in Scotland.
Like most Scottish people, Ray's not easy to communicate with, but in
his case it's because he's a bit mad. Living in some sort of fantasy
medieval world, he's incapable of giving a straight answer to a straight
question, preferring instead to express himself through the medium of
"I'm hard yet soft, I am coloured yet clear, I am fruity and sweet. I am
jelly. What am I?"
Sebastian is the Prime Minister's aide, and loves him deeply.
Clingy, bitchy and insanely jealous, Sebastian wants nothing more than
to have the Prime Minister all to himself. The Prime Minister only just
tolerates Sebastian's erratic behaviour, but is largely oblivious to his
aide's obsession - even when Sebastian is forcibly slow-dancing with him
to Careless Whisper.
Sir Norman is the Member of Parliament for Little Fumble and has a
perfect family: he is happily married with three children and a dog.
What a shame that he has a rather unfortunate habit of getting caught in
the most unconstitutional of positions with strangers - nothing,
however, that a family press call won't sort out…
Sid lives in Larchwood Close, Banalington, and is the chairman of the
local Neighbourly Watch Committee - which he runs with military
precision, much to the alarm and amusement of his fellow residents.
Any would-be vandals, litterbugs, or indeed caravan owners beware: Sid
operates a zero tolerance policy.
Whether nicking stuff from the supermarket or swapping her baby for a
Westlife CD, Vicky Pollard reacts to any accusation with indignant
outrage, while filling you in on 'this fing wot you know nuffin about'.
"Yeah but, no but"
"There's, like, a teenaged delinquent character in every country," Lucas
says. "Every city has characters like that. Although she's from Bristol,
which is, you know, in England, I imagine they're in Toronto, too. She's
trailer trash. They're everywhere."
And the rest...
Mr Cleeves - Mr Cleeves is a
traditional-looking yet bizarre teacher at Kelsey Grammar School. Mr Cleeves
sets the pupils strange tasks such as finding the square root of Popeye or
setting a test on crisps. He also has trouble with reading.
The Record Breakers - At the end of each
show, two men, both called Ian, with bushy beards and thick jumpers, are trying
to set a world record but end up not meeting the requirements. For example,
"Most People in a Mini" attempt, where five people just squeeze in.
Gary and Jason - Gary and Jason are two
friends who always visit Gary's grandmother, on whom Jason has a crush. Jason
always tries to play on to Gary's grandmother, by wiping her spillings and
sucking her toes, the latter of which makes Gary and Jason fall out.
PC Bryce and PC Rawlinson - Gives bad
news and much confusion to Mrs Harris.
- At St Denise's Hospital,
Warren's tearful family sit around his bedside waiting as the old man takes his
final breath; it can only be a matter of time – only Warren isn't quite ready to
pop his clogs just yet. He's just got time to fit in one last café latte, oh,
and a chocolate muffin if they've got one...
Peter Andre - 'Royal Correspondent for
Mr Mann - Mr Mann frequently enters a
shop, looking for something in particular. The shop, although it sells different
items each episode, is always run by the same man, named Roy (Lucas) The
sketches' trademarks are Mr Mann's absurdly specific or general requests and
Roy's unseen wife Margaret (played by Stirling Gallacher), who gives help from
upstairs. She apparently doesn't have any arms or legs. Mr Mann only appeared
once in the first series, but was a regular character in the second and third
Linda Flint - Linda is a university
counsellor who always has a student in her office asking for something, usually
course-related. Linda calls a man named Martin to grant the request and is asked
to describe the student in question. While she often begins with complimentary
descriptors, she ignorantly uses descriptions such as "big fat lesbian",
"ching-chong Chinaman" and "Oompa Loompa" after the kinder words fail, much to
the shock of the students in question. In the last episode of Series 3, all of
the students she had insulted in Series 2 and 3 came to tell her they had placed
a formal complaint about her, but she simply ignored them by calling Martin to
talk about it and referring to them as "the whole cast of Fraggle Rock".
Piano Player - The Piano Player is an
unnamed man who plays at the Uncle Albert Hall. He pauses in his recitals to say
or do mindless things, such as checking where his shopping bag is, to read a
text message, to tell someone that he forgot to set the video and ask when
Liz and Clive - Liz and Clive are a
middle-aged couple who spend a lot of time eating in their local Chinese
restaurant. Liz frequently claims that she was a bridesmaid for Mollie Sugden,
which Clive does not like.
April May and Neville Stephens - Both
work together for St John's Ambulance. Famous for giving their clients "mints"
rather than tablets.
Cliff Robers - 'Fat Fighters' slimmer of
the Year. Best known for his role in the BBC comedy 'The Office' as 'Ali G'.
April and Neville - April (Walliams) and
Neville (Lucas) are two supposed First Aid experts. Neville is a young boy with
little experience, while April (with an exemplorary safety record of only four
deaths) is supposedly experienced, though she uses variety of mints instead of
medical procedures to treat patients. Although several sketches involving the
two characters were made, only one made the final cut because the creators
believed that the characters didn't work on the TV.
Dame Sally Malcome - A novelist.
Des Kaye - Des Kaye is a rejected
children's TV host who works in a DIY store. He is often seen annoying the other
members of staff with his puppet (called Croc-O-Dile) and his frequent sayings
of "Wicky Woo".
- Records many phone messages but
cannot seem to find the perfect one...
Edward and Samantha Grant - Edward Grant
is a schoolteacher married to his ex-pupil Samantha. He claims that they share
an ordinary marriage just like any other, but he often treats her like a school
pupil, such as "The bell is a signal for me, not for you" upon the doorbell
ringing and "You copied Nigella Lawson's work!" upon Samantha's revelation that
she used a Nigella Lawson sorbet recipe.
Doug - Doug is a Scottish drugs
counsellor who, having had a past life with drugs, give out helpful (yet
abusive) advice to others.
Sir Bernard Chumley - "I'm an actor yes"
who cares for his sister Kitty.
Michael Dinner - Michael Dinner (also
known as The Posh Diner) is a man who is always seen in a restaurant. In each of
his sketches he is approached by a waiter and orders posh dishes, before
ordering something stupid (such as Um Bongo, Hubba Bubba or Monster Munch) as
the waiter walks away.
Dying Man - A man in hospital who keeps
saying goodbye to his relatives, but then not dying. In the end of the sketch,
he gets up to go to the toilet "before he goes".
Horse Whisperer - Horse Whisperer is a
man who owns a computer shop and talks to his horse whenever a customer asks him
for technical advice, he likes to touch and kiss the horse. The horse seems to
know about computers, but is clueless about iPods.